The huge success of the Netflix teen drama series, Sex Education, is partly fuelled by the poor quality of sex ed lessons in schools. Young people are fed up with prudish, vague and incomplete information from their teachers - and parents. So they are turning to the often explicit TV series to get answers.

During my recent school talks on human rights, more than half the pupils said they had watched Sex Education, mostly because their classes about sex were, in their words, “crap, boring and out-of-touch.” 

Little wonder that millions of young people are entering adulthood emotionally and sexually ill-prepared. Too many subsequently endure disordered relationships, ranging from unfulfilling to outright abusive.

The result? Much unhappiness - and sometimes mental and physical ill-health.

A lot of relationship and sex education (RSE) still concentrates on the biological facts of reproduction and on using a condom to prevent HIV. Relatively little teaching is actually about sex – or feelings and relationships.

It frequently starts too late; after many young people have become sexually active and adopted bad habits such as unsafe sex.

While RSE should not encourage early sex (it is best if young people wait), it should prepare them for a satisfying, safe sexual and emotional life.

Young people’s health and welfare must take priority over squeamishness and embarrassment about sex.

What, then, needs to change in order to make RSE more effective?

Young people’s health and welfare must take priority over squeamishness and embarrassment about sex. Political, religious and cultural sensitivities cannot be allowed to thwart mandatory age-appropriate RSE in every school, from the first year of primary education onwards.

Based on listening to young people’s own ideas during my talks in schools, it is time that RSE is revised radically, based on the following principles: 

Mandatory Lessons In Every School

Sex and relationships are a very important part of most adult’s lives. That’s why education about them should be a legal requirement in every school, including religious schools and schools outside the state sector. The aim should be to prepare young people for adult life by ensuring they are sexually and emotionally literate. RSE lessons should be at least monthly all throughout a child’s school life - not once a term or once a year. And the lessons should be LGBT+ inclusive.

Education From The First Year Of Primary School

RSE needs to be age-appropriate; starting from the first year of primary school by talking about love and relationships, including non-traditional families (single parent, extended and same-gender families).

It should also discuss the correct names for body parts, physical changes at puberty and, to tackle abuse, grooming and inappropriate touching, in order to teach children the difference between caring and exploitative behaviours.

Lessons should acknowledge the risks and dangers of sex, but from the age of 16 should also acknowledge the pleasures – and that sex is good for us.

One reason for starting young is that many children now begin puberty between the ages of eight and 12. Long beforehand, they need to know about the physical and hormonal changes they will undergo and the feelings and desires they will develop. Keeping them ignorant threatens their happiness and welfare.

Sex Is Good For You

RSE lessons should acknowledge the risks and dangers of sex, but from the age of 16 should also acknowledge the pleasures – and that sex is good for us. It is natural, wholesome, fun and (with safe sex) healthy. Quality sex can have a beneficial effect on our mental and physical well-being.